Conspiracy Theory related to Confinement

I just thought of a theory, and am beginning to be more convinced about it the more I think of it..

Confinement period is a conspiracy thought up by someone or some group (must be by a male because they don't have to go through this, either that or some lunatic woman) to help/ force/ aid her in losing off all the pregnancy weight. If you are going " what......?" hahaha read on first..

Theory & Hypothesis: Confinement rituals make you feel miserable, and when you feel miserable you eat less, or have less appetite to eat other food, you lose weight.

Evidences:
1. Making you eat the same food everyday, it becomes mundane and you do not look forward to meal times. Also, you will chew slowly, and food becomes more easily digested and absorbed by your body, hence less burden on your stomach.
2. Prohibiting personal hygiene routine such as washing of hair and shower so that one feels miserable and depressed. You are so busy scratching your itchy hair that you forget about hunger.
3. Loads of herbs and dark colour looking medicine and soups to ward off your appetite..
4. Prevent you from going out of the house so that you are not tempted by variety of food available in the outside world.

Kekeke.. I am thinking: those who are not going through confinement right now must be laughing at this theory, and thinking that I have gone nuts.. true, I might be going nuts because of the rules I have to follow during confinement. But nevertheless, this is my theory.. at least until my confinement period is over... (it doesn't feel like it is going to be over right now)...